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Losowy SMS: What do you call a small parent? A minimum ! 1. What's the difference between Windows
95 and a
virus?
A virus does something. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(the): 83 2. Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,
SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
A: A blonde going through a flashing red
light. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(): 113 3. What's the difference
between Windows 95 and a virus?
A virus does something. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(the): 83 4. Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,
SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
A: A blonde going through a flashing red
light. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(): 113 5. The officer shouted
orders to a
nearby soldier. With considerable bravery, the GI ran
directly onto
the field of battle, in the line of fire, to retrieve a
dispatch
case from a dead soldier. In a hail of bullets, he dove back to
safety.
"Private," the officer said, "I'm recommending you for a
medal. You
risked your life to save the locations of our secret
warehouses."
"Warehouses?" the private shouted. "I thought you said
whorehouses!" Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(officer): 471 6. "I was married 3 times" explained
the man to a newly discovered
drinking partner, "and I'll never
marry again. My first 2 wives died
of eating poison mushrooms and my
3rd wife died of a fractured skull."
"That's a shame." said his
friend , "How did it happen?"
"She wouldn't eat the
mushrooms!" Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(i): 316 7. What's the speed limit of
sex?
68; at 69 you have to turn around. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(the): 68 8. What did the egg say to the
boiling water?
"How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got
laid a minute
ago." Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(did): 126 9. A ragged individual stranded for several months
on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day
noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it.
Rushing to
the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands
withdrew the
message.
"Due to lack of maintenance," he read,
"we regretfully have found it
necessary to cancel your e-mail
account." Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(ragged): 407 10. This customer comes into
the computer
store. "I'm looking for a mystery Adventure Game with
lots of graphics.
You know, something really challenging."
"Well," replied the
clerk, "Have you tried Windows 98?" Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(customer): 220 1 |
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Ofiary handlu ludźmi wylądowały na bruku
PRZEGLĄD PRASY. Jedyne w Polsce miejsce, w którym pomagano ofiarom handlarzy ludźmi, kończy właśnie działalność - pisze "Dziennik". Warszawski hostel prowadzony przez fundację La Strada, gdzie opiekowano się kobietami wyrwanymi z rąk gangsterów, 1 stycznia został zamknięty.
SAAB oskarża MON o ustawienie głośnego przetargu
PRZEGLĄD PRASY. SAAB przegrał przetarg na dostarczenie rakiet dla naszej Marynarki Wojennej. Idzie do sądu, bo twierdzi, że resort obrony faworyzował jego konkurenta. Koncern będzie się domagał wielomilionowego odszkodowania - pisze "Rzeczpospolita".
Strażak w każdej firmie
PRZEGLĄD PRASY. Przymus zatrudnienia specjalisty od pożaru uderzy w małe firmy - akcentuje "Gazeta Prawna", nawiązując do nowych obowiązków bhp w Kodeksie Pracy.
Medialny Sojusz
PO i <a href="http://tematy-wiadomosci.gazeta.pl/S/1437,Sojusz-Lewicy-Demokratycznej">SLD</a> chcą jak najszybciej pozbawić ludzi <a href="http://tematy-wiadomosci.gazeta.pl/P/1436,Prawo-i-Sprawiedliwosc">PiS</a>, <a href="http://tematy-wiadomosci.gazeta.pl/L/1442,Liga-Polskich-Rodzin">LPR</a> i Samoobrony władzy w mediach publicznych. Przyśpieszają prace nad nową ustawą medialną